To fill the void I have created in Samuel's life by temporarily removing The Upside Down Show, he is now watching his Bob the Builder DVD. When the DVD player isn't available he is putting it into our Playstation II (this is during time when he has reached "Your Choice" on his schedule). He likes looking up Bob the Builder when he is on the internet and likes to listen to the starting theme song in different languages.
I tried watching Samuel play on the computer tonight and he got very upset "Okay Mom, now you can go!" I'll have to take some time to get him used to having me around, I'm hoping that we can play games together on the computer.
It's starting to get complicated when the boys have free time and they compete over electronic devices to play with! There's enough to go around, it only gets to be a problem when two of them want the same thing.
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Autism Speaks - With Many Voices!
Did you happen to see Larry King Live on CNN tonight? He interviewed Bill Cosby, Toni Braxton (the singer whose son was recently diagnosed with autism), Suzanne Wright (founder of Autism Speaks), and several other people.
I do not deny anyone the reactions he or she may have to finding out his or her child is autistic. Just as there is a spectrum of autistic conditions, so there is also a spectrum of parent and family reactions. (I admit that I don't understand some of the reactions and cannot relate to them, but we are all individuals and have varying expectations and outlooks on life) Increasing autism awareness and appealing for help for families of children with autism are good things. I saw both of these portrayed in the interviews last night.
The picture of autism that was portrayed in the interview and in the clips of the video "Autism Every Day" (which were showed between interview segments) however, by no means paints a complete picture of how the population of autistic families is living with autism. It bothers me very much that this picture is incomplete and that the picture that is out there on national television is so negative.
It is time for the rest of us who have different opinions, different outlooks, and different approaches to start filling in the rest of the picture that the public sees. Maybe Autism Awareness Month (April) would be a good time to do this.
I really hope that any parents of newly diagnosed autistic children who saw that interview don't walk away with the picture of despair and frustration that I saw portrayed of autism.
I do not deny anyone the reactions he or she may have to finding out his or her child is autistic. Just as there is a spectrum of autistic conditions, so there is also a spectrum of parent and family reactions. (I admit that I don't understand some of the reactions and cannot relate to them, but we are all individuals and have varying expectations and outlooks on life) Increasing autism awareness and appealing for help for families of children with autism are good things. I saw both of these portrayed in the interviews last night.
The picture of autism that was portrayed in the interview and in the clips of the video "Autism Every Day" (which were showed between interview segments) however, by no means paints a complete picture of how the population of autistic families is living with autism. It bothers me very much that this picture is incomplete and that the picture that is out there on national television is so negative.
It is time for the rest of us who have different opinions, different outlooks, and different approaches to start filling in the rest of the picture that the public sees. Maybe Autism Awareness Month (April) would be a good time to do this.
I really hope that any parents of newly diagnosed autistic children who saw that interview don't walk away with the picture of despair and frustration that I saw portrayed of autism.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
The Regulator in Action
I am on the offensive to deal with The Upside Down Show scripting. Thanks "FarmWife2" for reminding me about strategies that our in-home helpers have discussed with me previously. Like I said yesterday, sometimes its easy to slip into allowing things that might not be the best thing, just because they make Samuel happy.
I had a talk with Samuel's instructional aid this morning and she does let Samuel script during his sensory breaks. I was very pleased to hear that during recess, however, she discourages the scripting so that he can try to interact with his classmates. Now I'm just waiting to hear from the special education teacher to make sure they can verbally remind Samuel during the day that he will be allowed to script during sensory times (as opposed to just discouraging scripting). I think that if he is reminded that there IS an appropriate scripting time he will be more likely to NOT SCRIPT when that is being asked of him. I'm also waiting to hear what she thinks about doing a social story.
Last night at dinner I announced, "Tomorrow morning is the last day that you can play The Upside Down Show before we get in the car." Samuel fussed about that a bit, so I told him, "why don't you play hopscotch instead?" We'll see how that works. In the car this morning Samuel asked, "Can I still watch The Upside Down Show?" I told him, "Yes, you can watch it tomorrow (Friday) afternoon." For now I'll let him watch it and see if cutting out the morning play of it helps to reduce the incidence of scripting it at school.
This afternoon we are going to the park and then off to a "book fair" event at school in the evening. The boys always like going to the book fairs. They make wish lists and I usually let them get one or two books each. This is the first time I'll have an in-home helper with me and that will make it so much easier!
We went from 45 degrees (7 deg. C) yesterday to an anticipated 70 degrees (21 deg. C) today!
I had a talk with Samuel's instructional aid this morning and she does let Samuel script during his sensory breaks. I was very pleased to hear that during recess, however, she discourages the scripting so that he can try to interact with his classmates. Now I'm just waiting to hear from the special education teacher to make sure they can verbally remind Samuel during the day that he will be allowed to script during sensory times (as opposed to just discouraging scripting). I think that if he is reminded that there IS an appropriate scripting time he will be more likely to NOT SCRIPT when that is being asked of him. I'm also waiting to hear what she thinks about doing a social story.
Last night at dinner I announced, "Tomorrow morning is the last day that you can play The Upside Down Show before we get in the car." Samuel fussed about that a bit, so I told him, "why don't you play hopscotch instead?" We'll see how that works. In the car this morning Samuel asked, "Can I still watch The Upside Down Show?" I told him, "Yes, you can watch it tomorrow (Friday) afternoon." For now I'll let him watch it and see if cutting out the morning play of it helps to reduce the incidence of scripting it at school.
This afternoon we are going to the park and then off to a "book fair" event at school in the evening. The boys always like going to the book fairs. They make wish lists and I usually let them get one or two books each. This is the first time I'll have an in-home helper with me and that will make it so much easier!
We went from 45 degrees (7 deg. C) yesterday to an anticipated 70 degrees (21 deg. C) today!
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Super Scripting
I wish that the word "super" in the title for this posting meant "fantastic," but it actually means "an extraordinary amount." Samuel, and all my boys for that matter, really love The Upside Down Show. I let them watch it on the afternoons when our in-home helpers aren't here, and once they get ready each morning they run outside to play it in the back yard for a few minutes before we drive Samuel to school. Getting to play is a great reinforcer for Samuel to do the finishing touches on getting ready.
I'm seeing signs now that it's getting out of hand. Samuel had a behavioral incident in school yesterday because he just wouldn't snap out of a scripting spell. His teachers didn't know what he was talking about, but a fellow autistic classmate was able to tell them it was from The Upside Down Show. He also scripts an awful lot at home. While we did some homework late yesterday afternoon I also couldn't get him to snap out of a scripting spell.
It's a constant struggle to maintain some kind of balance with the things Samuel enjoys. They quickly turn into obsessions that cause him to tune out. I went through this a few months ago with his videos. When I see this happen I have to create some kind of regulatory procedure. He now has to "earn" videos. I will give him a few each day to look at, after he does something required of him on his schedule. The tricky part is remembering to gather them up at the end of the day and put them away. Samuel now takes them up to bed with him! I try to discourage that and have him keep them downstairs where I can easily put them away. If I miss getting them before bedtime then I just put them away while he is at school.
Looks like I am facing that now with The Upside Down Show. It is going to be harder to regulate this because the other boys like it also. At school the teachers are talking to Samuel about not scripting during class time. I should make sure they have a social story for this, and perhaps see if there is some kind of free time where they would let him do it for a short spell. I'll probably come up with something at home where he can script for a few minutes when he gets home and then I'll have to try to come up with a way of making him understand that "scripting time is finished, time to________" Maybe that scripting time could be turned into a reinforcer.
I'm seeing signs now that it's getting out of hand. Samuel had a behavioral incident in school yesterday because he just wouldn't snap out of a scripting spell. His teachers didn't know what he was talking about, but a fellow autistic classmate was able to tell them it was from The Upside Down Show. He also scripts an awful lot at home. While we did some homework late yesterday afternoon I also couldn't get him to snap out of a scripting spell.
It's a constant struggle to maintain some kind of balance with the things Samuel enjoys. They quickly turn into obsessions that cause him to tune out. I went through this a few months ago with his videos. When I see this happen I have to create some kind of regulatory procedure. He now has to "earn" videos. I will give him a few each day to look at, after he does something required of him on his schedule. The tricky part is remembering to gather them up at the end of the day and put them away. Samuel now takes them up to bed with him! I try to discourage that and have him keep them downstairs where I can easily put them away. If I miss getting them before bedtime then I just put them away while he is at school.
Looks like I am facing that now with The Upside Down Show. It is going to be harder to regulate this because the other boys like it also. At school the teachers are talking to Samuel about not scripting during class time. I should make sure they have a social story for this, and perhaps see if there is some kind of free time where they would let him do it for a short spell. I'll probably come up with something at home where he can script for a few minutes when he gets home and then I'll have to try to come up with a way of making him understand that "scripting time is finished, time to________" Maybe that scripting time could be turned into a reinforcer.
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Appreciating My Husband
Often overshadowed by St. Patrick's Day is the even greater feast during the month of March in the Catholic church, St. Joseph Day on March 19. St. Joseph is the patron, role model, and advocate in heaven for fathers.
In light of the occasion, I took a few minutes yesterday to think of my husband's relationship with our children. While my husband has half-siblings, he grew up as an only child in his parent's household. Because of this I think he is sometimes a bit overwhelmed having 4 children in the house as we do. I think he remembers "home" being a much quieter place than what ours has become! He seems to do best dealing with the children one-on-one, though tonight he took on all 4 while I attended a Special Education Advisory Committee Meeting for our county. He deserves a lot of credit for keeping a baby girl who thinks she is entitled to be attached to Mommy 24 hours a day and has recently discovered the joy of cookies and the ability to ask for them (that is all she says ALL DAY - "gook", rhymes with "book").
Go-kart racing has become the family hobby in the past year. So far only my husband and oldest son participate, but the plan is for this to change as the next two boys get older. It is looking as though racing will be the venue for all of us to be involved in something together. There are plans to involve Samuel this year by letting him try driving. Then next year our youngest son will start.
We don't know what to expect with Samuel. I cannot picture him following the necessary rules to participate, but he could always surprise us! Perhaps if he cannot drive then he could help with mechanical things as time goes on. I'm guessing I will eventually be the fan club and event family organizer. Maybe our baby girl will drive some day too! With any luck I'll at least get to see my oldest son in a race this year, but I don't expect the entire family to be involved for several years yet. I might be kicking and screaming when I do get involved, but I want to act according to what everyone in the family enjoys.
My husband and I bring our own strengths into the family. I sometimes complain about how we don't "work together" enough, but I am grateful for his unique personality and outlook on life. He is much better at bringing fun activity in for the boys than I am, especially as they get older. Dealing with Samuel, and two additional babies since he was diagnosed, has taken its toll on me in that regard, I'm just too tired during and at the end of the day to care about much else beyond the little world of child rearing that I live in. A short trip during Easter and a Disney World vacation are being planned and all I can think of so far is how difficult they will be! If it was up to me I'd probably just spend the next few years catching up on housework. Thank goodness my husband won't let that happen.
In light of the occasion, I took a few minutes yesterday to think of my husband's relationship with our children. While my husband has half-siblings, he grew up as an only child in his parent's household. Because of this I think he is sometimes a bit overwhelmed having 4 children in the house as we do. I think he remembers "home" being a much quieter place than what ours has become! He seems to do best dealing with the children one-on-one, though tonight he took on all 4 while I attended a Special Education Advisory Committee Meeting for our county. He deserves a lot of credit for keeping a baby girl who thinks she is entitled to be attached to Mommy 24 hours a day and has recently discovered the joy of cookies and the ability to ask for them (that is all she says ALL DAY - "gook", rhymes with "book").
Go-kart racing has become the family hobby in the past year. So far only my husband and oldest son participate, but the plan is for this to change as the next two boys get older. It is looking as though racing will be the venue for all of us to be involved in something together. There are plans to involve Samuel this year by letting him try driving. Then next year our youngest son will start.
We don't know what to expect with Samuel. I cannot picture him following the necessary rules to participate, but he could always surprise us! Perhaps if he cannot drive then he could help with mechanical things as time goes on. I'm guessing I will eventually be the fan club and event family organizer. Maybe our baby girl will drive some day too! With any luck I'll at least get to see my oldest son in a race this year, but I don't expect the entire family to be involved for several years yet. I might be kicking and screaming when I do get involved, but I want to act according to what everyone in the family enjoys.
My husband and I bring our own strengths into the family. I sometimes complain about how we don't "work together" enough, but I am grateful for his unique personality and outlook on life. He is much better at bringing fun activity in for the boys than I am, especially as they get older. Dealing with Samuel, and two additional babies since he was diagnosed, has taken its toll on me in that regard, I'm just too tired during and at the end of the day to care about much else beyond the little world of child rearing that I live in. A short trip during Easter and a Disney World vacation are being planned and all I can think of so far is how difficult they will be! If it was up to me I'd probably just spend the next few years catching up on housework. Thank goodness my husband won't let that happen.
Sunday, March 18, 2007
Back to Church
This morning was the first time I have taken Samuel to church in quite a few weeks. I think this is only the second time I have taken him to mass since the "Kachow!" incident. In the weeks since then we have either had sick children or were recovering from the time change so Samuel has not gone with me. Instead I have taken baby girl. She is even more difficult to take to church than Samuel these days! I think our family will be doing a split-shift job attending church for the next few months.
I was a bit apprehensive about taking Samuel this morning. When I mentioned taking him yesterday the first thing he said was "I won't hit anyone!" We started off in "the big church." I came armed with a mini-visual schedule along with the rest of my "church survival kit" (see picture above ) It includes a dry-erase board to write short messages (I try to use as few verbal prompts as possible), some saint trading cards, a mini-visual schedule with good behavior prompts, a book of the Lord's Prayer (the only prayer I'm trying to get him to recite - which he doesn't do yet), an inconspicuous sensory toy and a rosary (more conspicuous but visually acceptable in context at church). Oops, I left out an important item in the picture, a small non-crinkly pouch of skittles! We made it in the big church just about as long as the last time we went, into the priest's homily (about a half hour). Samuel just couldn't resist scripting The Upside Down Show. My "whisper voice" written and then oral prompts were losing their effectiveness so I figured it was time to go to the lobby. I had to frequently prompt him to have a quiet mouth the rest of mass. On several occasions he said "Mom I'm having a quiet mouth!" his way of asking for a skittle!
I was a bit apprehensive about taking Samuel this morning. When I mentioned taking him yesterday the first thing he said was "I won't hit anyone!" We started off in "the big church." I came armed with a mini-visual schedule along with the rest of my "church survival kit" (see picture above ) It includes a dry-erase board to write short messages (I try to use as few verbal prompts as possible), some saint trading cards, a mini-visual schedule with good behavior prompts, a book of the Lord's Prayer (the only prayer I'm trying to get him to recite - which he doesn't do yet), an inconspicuous sensory toy and a rosary (more conspicuous but visually acceptable in context at church). Oops, I left out an important item in the picture, a small non-crinkly pouch of skittles! We made it in the big church just about as long as the last time we went, into the priest's homily (about a half hour). Samuel just couldn't resist scripting The Upside Down Show. My "whisper voice" written and then oral prompts were losing their effectiveness so I figured it was time to go to the lobby. I had to frequently prompt him to have a quiet mouth the rest of mass. On several occasions he said "Mom I'm having a quiet mouth!" his way of asking for a skittle!
I did not walk up to the front of the church for communion. A priest was able to bring it back to me, and others who cannot walk up. I told Samuel we will not go to the front of the church for communion again until we apologize to the sister that he hit. I talked to the sisters at the end of mass today to try and find out who he had hit so he could apologize directly to her, but the sister that he hit must not have been there, they didn't know what I was talking about. They very graciously told me that it was okay, for which I thanked them, but I told them I still want Samuel to apologize to stress the need of proper behavior and manners.
After mass we then proceeded to "the doughnut store" (a name given by my oldest son when he was two years old). A pretty good week! We are proceeding SLOWLY, SLOWLY at church but it's all staying positive for Samuel so that is good. Not so long ago I never would have imagined that we would be leaving the cry room this winter!
Phonics for Samuel
In our recent meeting to discuss Samuel's progress in academics at school, I brought up concerns about Samuel's spelling. He seems to be having trouble with vowels digraphs and consonant combinations. His average spelling score is 80%, but a recent test, where the "ei" and "ay" vowel digraphs were used, some of them also having one or two consonant combinations, had a score of 20%. A second attempt resulted in 30% correct.
Samuel's teacher agreed to start working with him on phonics. I asked for some worksheets that I can use to work at home and they came home the next day.
This is the first time that I'm aware of Samuel working with phonics. He learned to read sight words in kindergarten and first grade. I believe that much of his ability to read is by memorizing words. When he is reading , he often looks at a word and just takes a guess as to what the word is. In these cases he doesn't appear to take any time to "sound out" letters.
I just tried a worksheet with the "long a" vowel sound this morning. Before doing the worksheet we talked about vowels sounds (including a review of what a vowel is, and that letters can make more than one sound) He did pretty good. The worksheet entailed choosing the appropriate word from a choice of 6 to fill in blanks that made up a story. He did well at understanding the context and then writing in the correct words.
I'd like to hear about what others have encountered with their children when they are learning to read. I'm wondering if teaching phonics will help him do better on his spelling tests.
Samuel's teacher agreed to start working with him on phonics. I asked for some worksheets that I can use to work at home and they came home the next day.
This is the first time that I'm aware of Samuel working with phonics. He learned to read sight words in kindergarten and first grade. I believe that much of his ability to read is by memorizing words. When he is reading , he often looks at a word and just takes a guess as to what the word is. In these cases he doesn't appear to take any time to "sound out" letters.
I just tried a worksheet with the "long a" vowel sound this morning. Before doing the worksheet we talked about vowels sounds (including a review of what a vowel is, and that letters can make more than one sound) He did pretty good. The worksheet entailed choosing the appropriate word from a choice of 6 to fill in blanks that made up a story. He did well at understanding the context and then writing in the correct words.
I'd like to hear about what others have encountered with their children when they are learning to read. I'm wondering if teaching phonics will help him do better on his spelling tests.
Saturday, March 17, 2007
Reflections of a Rookie Blogger and Follow Up to Situation with Academics at School
I have been blogging now for about 6 weeks and am enjoying it immensely. Since finding out my son was autistic I have always been frustrated by the "doom and gloom" approach to autism. It has been such a relief to find such positive (yet realistic and honest) viewpoints towards autism in the many many blogs I have come across. I wish I had looked into this much sooner than I did!
I love all the different kinds of blogs that are out there... the creative, the plain, the well-written and not-so-well-written, the artsy, the dramatic, the popular and not-so-popular. I have had lots of fun getting started and fine-tuning the features of my blog. I absolutely love the freedom we are given to make our own forums by blogging!
Six weeks ago I was just about at my wits end over my son's situation at school . I started looking up some things about neurodiversity and ended up coming across numerous blogs composed by people who do respect their autistic children by accepting them for who they are. I initially had no intention of setting up my own blog, but after a few days of wanting to comment and feeling inspired to tell my own family's story, I did just that! I shared the fact that I had a blog with a very few friends and family members after I had it for a month. It's kind of scary for me to share some of these thoughts with people that I know.
In these six weeks I have become much more settled regarding Samuel. I have met with his special education teacher two times. His learning requirements have been relaxed in his subjects. His teacher is also using a token board to provide small reinforcements for Samuel as he does his work at school. The incidence of behavioral outbursts has dropped since these changes were made. I think his overall stress level has gone down too. He seems more eager to get to school in the morning. His test scores have improved. The exercise I have put myself through in making up homework assignments has been exhausting, but it's nice to know that it is paying off. I better understand what Samuel is capable of and not capable of. Samuel's teacher has been attentive to my questions and requests, and our regular meetings, e-mails, and phone calls to each other are helping me to feel better about Samuel being at school. This has been a tough year of adjustment for both me and Samuel, but now, almost 3/4 of the way through the school year, we're both quite settled.
On the lighter side of things, we had another weather surprise today, about 5 inches of snow! It started as rain Thursday night, which continued Friday morning and started mixing with sleet. School was closed at noon and shortly after we got home it changed to snow. Samuel was happy to have the afternoon free. The only work I gave him the rest of the day was some tidying up in his bedroom. Friday is cleaning day around here!
I love all the different kinds of blogs that are out there... the creative, the plain, the well-written and not-so-well-written, the artsy, the dramatic, the popular and not-so-popular. I have had lots of fun getting started and fine-tuning the features of my blog. I absolutely love the freedom we are given to make our own forums by blogging!
Six weeks ago I was just about at my wits end over my son's situation at school . I started looking up some things about neurodiversity and ended up coming across numerous blogs composed by people who do respect their autistic children by accepting them for who they are. I initially had no intention of setting up my own blog, but after a few days of wanting to comment and feeling inspired to tell my own family's story, I did just that! I shared the fact that I had a blog with a very few friends and family members after I had it for a month. It's kind of scary for me to share some of these thoughts with people that I know.
In these six weeks I have become much more settled regarding Samuel. I have met with his special education teacher two times. His learning requirements have been relaxed in his subjects. His teacher is also using a token board to provide small reinforcements for Samuel as he does his work at school. The incidence of behavioral outbursts has dropped since these changes were made. I think his overall stress level has gone down too. He seems more eager to get to school in the morning. His test scores have improved. The exercise I have put myself through in making up homework assignments has been exhausting, but it's nice to know that it is paying off. I better understand what Samuel is capable of and not capable of. Samuel's teacher has been attentive to my questions and requests, and our regular meetings, e-mails, and phone calls to each other are helping me to feel better about Samuel being at school. This has been a tough year of adjustment for both me and Samuel, but now, almost 3/4 of the way through the school year, we're both quite settled.
On the lighter side of things, we had another weather surprise today, about 5 inches of snow! It started as rain Thursday night, which continued Friday morning and started mixing with sleet. School was closed at noon and shortly after we got home it changed to snow. Samuel was happy to have the afternoon free. The only work I gave him the rest of the day was some tidying up in his bedroom. Friday is cleaning day around here!
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
The Video Junkie Strikes Again. What WAS I Thinking?!
In social situations Samuel often pleasantly surprises us, but every now and then I am faced with a harsh reminder of how limited we are in our activity because of him.
I took dinner to a family that lives near us a few days ago. At the family's request my children came in with me when I delivered the meal. It was a lovely warm day and I had visions of my boys and theirs playing together outside.
I should have know I was in trouble when his first question to them was ,"Where is your VCR?" He ended up finding their videotape collection and it was very difficult to redirect him. While doing so I had to pass my baby girl to someone else so I could manage Samuel. We ended up with her screaming and Samuel not cooperating at all! At the time I did not want to offend this family by leaving quickly, but now in hindsight I realize that we should not have stayed. They were very gracious and I'm sure didn't mind all that much, but I was supposed to be there to help out, not cause a commotion!
This is yet another reminder that I need to be working the social stories with Samuel! I cannot continue to take the risk of him being disruptive or possibly even dangerous. As situations arise I need to better assess the risk of taking him along. Perhaps I need to stick with the situations we have worked on already: the library, a couple of restaurants, a grocery store, church, some friends' houses.
I took dinner to a family that lives near us a few days ago. At the family's request my children came in with me when I delivered the meal. It was a lovely warm day and I had visions of my boys and theirs playing together outside.
I should have know I was in trouble when his first question to them was ,"Where is your VCR?" He ended up finding their videotape collection and it was very difficult to redirect him. While doing so I had to pass my baby girl to someone else so I could manage Samuel. We ended up with her screaming and Samuel not cooperating at all! At the time I did not want to offend this family by leaving quickly, but now in hindsight I realize that we should not have stayed. They were very gracious and I'm sure didn't mind all that much, but I was supposed to be there to help out, not cause a commotion!
This is yet another reminder that I need to be working the social stories with Samuel! I cannot continue to take the risk of him being disruptive or possibly even dangerous. As situations arise I need to better assess the risk of taking him along. Perhaps I need to stick with the situations we have worked on already: the library, a couple of restaurants, a grocery store, church, some friends' houses.
Samuel's Visual Schedule, A Visual!
Last weekend Samuel took the liberty of making up his own schedule, both on Saturday and Sunday. Normally I make up a schedule to cover key points of the day, like getting dressed in the morning, or approaching homework sessions, or perhaps special trips out of the house. When I do that, we cover times in between with an icon like "play."
This is the binder that we keep Samuel's schedule "icons" in.
The icons are about a 1.5" square. I print them in black and white using "Writing With Symbols" software on my computer. Our in-home services provider prints them in color on "Boardmaker." The icons are laminated. I already had quite a collection of icons when our in-home services started, so we continued using those icons and they have slowly added to them since then. The icons have velcro on the back and they are affixed to velcro strips on laminated pages in the book, an idea our in-home helpers gave me.
This is the binder that we keep Samuel's schedule "icons" in.
The icons are about a 1.5" square. I print them in black and white using "Writing With Symbols" software on my computer. Our in-home services provider prints them in color on "Boardmaker." The icons are laminated. I already had quite a collection of icons when our in-home services started, so we continued using those icons and they have slowly added to them since then. The icons have velcro on the back and they are affixed to velcro strips on laminated pages in the book, an idea our in-home helpers gave me.
Below is a picture of Samuel's schedule that hangs on the wall in our kitchen. This was put up in consultation with our in-home service providers and we started it almost two years ago. At the time we started using it only a total of 5 icons were on the schedule. Then a few months later we increased it to six and eventually the whole row under it was added. The "break" icon was added as we started teaching Samuel to "take a break," a means of getting him to control his own temper as it starts to escalate. At any point he wants to he can pull the "break" icon and go to a special designated area to calm down, take a break, etc... I will discuss this more at a later time.
The activity that Samuel is expected to complete gets moved to a space next to "It is time for..." When he is finished with that activity he removes the icon and puts it in the "finished" pocket. Then he moves the next icon up. He, of course, had to be prompted to learn how to move the icons appropriately, something that he picked up pretty quickly with our in-home service helpers. I'm usually a few steps behind in the prompting process from them.
This is the actual schedule Samuel made up on Saturday and I really liked how he spaced his highly reinforcing activities (snack, lunch, play outside, and downstairs) with less desirable things (though they are still somewhat fun for him) like "calendar" and "game." We sat at the table in the kitchen for our "meeting," which ended up being a conversation about what our favorite movie is (he determined that!). We also filled in the calendar that he has. After "calendar" came "videotape." If I remember correctly he did not watch a video, but asked me to get one for him to look at. After lunch he did go play outside, but he never completed the other things on his schedule after that. The last icon is "guitar." Samuel received a guitar for his birthday last year, but he doesn't play it very much yet. I'm hoping he will take lessons some day. Even though he didn't play it Saturday, it's encouraging that he's thinking of it!
This is the actual schedule Samuel made up on Saturday and I really liked how he spaced his highly reinforcing activities (snack, lunch, play outside, and downstairs) with less desirable things (though they are still somewhat fun for him) like "calendar" and "game." We sat at the table in the kitchen for our "meeting," which ended up being a conversation about what our favorite movie is (he determined that!). We also filled in the calendar that he has. After "calendar" came "videotape." If I remember correctly he did not watch a video, but asked me to get one for him to look at. After lunch he did go play outside, but he never completed the other things on his schedule after that. The last icon is "guitar." Samuel received a guitar for his birthday last year, but he doesn't play it very much yet. I'm hoping he will take lessons some day. Even though he didn't play it Saturday, it's encouraging that he's thinking of it!I first learned of autistic children using schedules to teach independent behavior in the book Activity Schedules for Children with Autism,Teaching Independent Behavior, by Lynn E. McClannahan and Patricia J. Krantz. This was what inspired me to make up icons for him, I just never did quite get a good system going on my own, something that our in-home service providers turned in the right direction. This has done wonders with keeping Samuel happy on a day-to-day basis, though we still have a long ways to go!
Time Change Blues
Last Saturday night I had the pleasure of attending a baby shower held for two wonderful women in my circle of friends. One of them is expecting baby #6 and the other baby #9! Amongst my friends I actually have a relatively small family! I had told myself ahead of time that I would not stay late since we would be losing an hour of sleep that night due to the change to daylight savings time. I was so busy eating, drinking, and being merry however, that before I knew it, it was 10:30pm! (Really 11:30!) I didn't even bother trying to get up the next morning. I allowed myself to sleep in until I awoke, whatever time that was.
I was up pretty late Sunday night, actually into the wee hours of Monday morning. I was preparing food to take to some neighbors and one of my pregnant friends for the following evening's dinner. As a result of being up so late (or so early depending on how you look at it) I overslept yesterday morning as well! I didn't wake up until the sun was starting to come up.
So this morning, the third morning after the time change, is the first time that I experienced just how dark it is at my normal wake-up time! Whose "wisdom" resulted in changing the time so early this year?!!!! Don't they remember all the problems we had back in the 70s when this was tried and children were going to school in the dark? I know that one of the reasons for the earlier change is to conserve energy, but aren't we offsetting that by needing to have all the lights on when we get up in the morning?
This was also the first morning my children experienced having to get up in the dark. They did okay, but Samuel was a bit perturbed because I had him wear short sleeves. We go through this every season change. Samuel doesn't like switching from long sleeves to short and vice versa. The worst change is when he goes from long pants to short pants. He never did quite get accustomed to that last summer.
I was up pretty late Sunday night, actually into the wee hours of Monday morning. I was preparing food to take to some neighbors and one of my pregnant friends for the following evening's dinner. As a result of being up so late (or so early depending on how you look at it) I overslept yesterday morning as well! I didn't wake up until the sun was starting to come up.
So this morning, the third morning after the time change, is the first time that I experienced just how dark it is at my normal wake-up time! Whose "wisdom" resulted in changing the time so early this year?!!!! Don't they remember all the problems we had back in the 70s when this was tried and children were going to school in the dark? I know that one of the reasons for the earlier change is to conserve energy, but aren't we offsetting that by needing to have all the lights on when we get up in the morning?
This was also the first morning my children experienced having to get up in the dark. They did okay, but Samuel was a bit perturbed because I had him wear short sleeves. We go through this every season change. Samuel doesn't like switching from long sleeves to short and vice versa. The worst change is when he goes from long pants to short pants. He never did quite get accustomed to that last summer.
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Quiet Time, More Fuel for My Sanity
I've mentioned before that my children have a late bedtime, partly to accomodate Samuel's "natural time clock." He just isn't ready to settle down at night much before 9:30 or 10:00. A few years ago there were many nights that he was up well past 11pm, or if he did fall asleep earlier then he was up and rarin' to go at about 3:30am! Samuel's sleep patterns are much more "normal" now. Even if he does wake up in the middle of the night we are usually able to get him to go back to sleep without too much trouble.
Anyways, because they are up so late at night they sleep in later in the morning. I do my best to get up early because this is the best time for me to be alone and get a few things done around the house. Sometimes I do this late at night, but that is more difficult because I'm often worn out at the end of the day.
Well, youngest son just peered over my shoulder and asked "Mommy, when you gonna get us breakfast?" Time's up! "Mommy, where's my sippy cup!"
Anyways, because they are up so late at night they sleep in later in the morning. I do my best to get up early because this is the best time for me to be alone and get a few things done around the house. Sometimes I do this late at night, but that is more difficult because I'm often worn out at the end of the day.
Well, youngest son just peered over my shoulder and asked "Mommy, when you gonna get us breakfast?" Time's up! "Mommy, where's my sippy cup!"
My Computer, My Friend
We recently made the switch from dial-up to high speed internet. In the process of loading the software to take care of this, the person helping us could not load it onto the hard drive of my computer. He had to take it away to clean up the memory and I was without my computer for a week! I was so worried about being without it! How would I live without my e-mail address book?!!! Fortunately I did have another computer available to use (though it didn't have a good printer), I was able to check my e-mail an alternate way, I survived without my address book, and I was able to create homework for Samuel manually. Talk about roughing it though! I feel LOST without my computer, my access to the internet (ie my link to the rest of the world), and a good printer!
I've had my computer back for a little over a week now and life is good again. Now I just have to figure out how to get Outlook to pick up my e-mails again. That is a glitch that I haven't ironed out yet.
I don't know how I would keep my sanity as the mother of a special needs child without my computer!
I've had my computer back for a little over a week now and life is good again. Now I just have to figure out how to get Outlook to pick up my e-mails again. That is a glitch that I haven't ironed out yet.
I don't know how I would keep my sanity as the mother of a special needs child without my computer!
Friday, March 9, 2007
Whatever it Takes!
I have been pleasantly surprised over the past few months with Samuel's responsiveness to incentives (ie.. "reinforcers"). This has been demonstrated to me for almost 2 years in how he follows the visual schedule when our in-home helpers are here, but it really wasn't until last fall that I made it my own tool to work with Samuel.
As Samuel started second grade and I saw how much his academic expectations were being raised, I realized that I was going to have to take action to get Samuel to do his homework. (This has been an ongoing process, see "The Evolution of Samuel's homework) I wanted Samuel to do the work ON HIS OWN, meaning that I would not sit there and verbalize over and over "time to do your work." The incentive: I used a token board with him and after he earned 4 tokens I gave him a small piece of candy. I also scheduled "Your Choice" after he finished his work, meaning that he could decide what he wanted to do (usually play on the computer, or Playstation).I had to spend a lot of time waiting him out. For weeks and weeks he dawdled at the start of each homework session, now he gets to work almost immediately. I'm also finding I don't have to reward tokens as frequently. In fact, tonight I didn't even take the token board or candy with me when we sat down to read a book together. He's getting more interested in finishing up the work and getting on to his fun activity!
Mealtimes are another opportunity to use incentives. In the last few months Samuel has become a very picky eater. His food repertoire has never been that great, but now he is starting to turn up his nose at some old standards like hot dogs and fish sticks. One night last week as Samuel came to the table he started "I'm not eating that." He was saying this about hot dogs, something we never used to have a problem with. I said "Samuel, if you eat your hot dogs I will let you have 3 videos." He ate the hot dogs. Tonight I served him "popcorn fish." He started complaining. I told him "Samuel, if you eat a piece of fish I will let you have a sip of soda." He tried eating one bite and demanded the soda. "No, you have eat the whole piece before you get the soda." He did so and got the soda. Then I had to ask for it back. He gave it back and I told him he could have more if he ate more fish. We went back and forth like this until his fish was gone!
Now I'll have to try this method to get him to sample new foods! I bought a can of spinach with a picture of Popeye on it not long ago, in the hopes that seeing the picture would inspire him to be like him (and eat the spinach!). It worked with my oldest son but not with Samuel!
This reminds me that Samuel is very capable in many things, my challenge in getting him to do things is a matter of making the performance of some activity worthwhile to him. He has an extreme version of the "What's in it for me?" line of thinking. It's something I face with each of my children (making them think something is worth doing), just to a greater degree with Samuel.
As Samuel started second grade and I saw how much his academic expectations were being raised, I realized that I was going to have to take action to get Samuel to do his homework. (This has been an ongoing process, see "The Evolution of Samuel's homework) I wanted Samuel to do the work ON HIS OWN, meaning that I would not sit there and verbalize over and over "time to do your work." The incentive: I used a token board with him and after he earned 4 tokens I gave him a small piece of candy. I also scheduled "Your Choice" after he finished his work, meaning that he could decide what he wanted to do (usually play on the computer, or Playstation).I had to spend a lot of time waiting him out. For weeks and weeks he dawdled at the start of each homework session, now he gets to work almost immediately. I'm also finding I don't have to reward tokens as frequently. In fact, tonight I didn't even take the token board or candy with me when we sat down to read a book together. He's getting more interested in finishing up the work and getting on to his fun activity!
Mealtimes are another opportunity to use incentives. In the last few months Samuel has become a very picky eater. His food repertoire has never been that great, but now he is starting to turn up his nose at some old standards like hot dogs and fish sticks. One night last week as Samuel came to the table he started "I'm not eating that." He was saying this about hot dogs, something we never used to have a problem with. I said "Samuel, if you eat your hot dogs I will let you have 3 videos." He ate the hot dogs. Tonight I served him "popcorn fish." He started complaining. I told him "Samuel, if you eat a piece of fish I will let you have a sip of soda." He tried eating one bite and demanded the soda. "No, you have eat the whole piece before you get the soda." He did so and got the soda. Then I had to ask for it back. He gave it back and I told him he could have more if he ate more fish. We went back and forth like this until his fish was gone!
Now I'll have to try this method to get him to sample new foods! I bought a can of spinach with a picture of Popeye on it not long ago, in the hopes that seeing the picture would inspire him to be like him (and eat the spinach!). It worked with my oldest son but not with Samuel!
This reminds me that Samuel is very capable in many things, my challenge in getting him to do things is a matter of making the performance of some activity worthwhile to him. He has an extreme version of the "What's in it for me?" line of thinking. It's something I face with each of my children (making them think something is worth doing), just to a greater degree with Samuel.
Thursday, March 8, 2007
Samples of Homework
Here are some samples of homework that I have come up with for Samuel. I've talked about this in various postings over the past month. I have found that worksheets that come home for him aren't formatted for him to work with easily. He works much better with bigger type. Though I do get a listing of the things they cover each quarter for his classes, Samuel only gets homework sent home for spelling and a reading program he participates in. I try to make up homework for Math, Science, Reading class, and Social Studies. I do this both to reinforce what he is learning at school, and for me to get an idea of his abilities. I think it is good for Samuel to be able to work in a variety of environments and with various people. I strongly believe that he should be able to do school work with his parents! I send in the homework to his teachers even though they don't expect it. We have been discussing how to make his work at school more meaningful so this is my contribution. Samuel's teacher is also trying different things.
This is a worksheet I made up for Science. Handwriting isn't one of Samuel's favorite things, so I only give him small amounts to do at a time.
This is a worksheet I made up for Samuel for Social Studies. I use "Writing With Symbols." Samuel doesn't need to see a picture with each word, so it takes a little bit of work to remove/add/adjust the symbols that come up. I probably don't work with it as efficiently as it is possible to either. Anyways, the work it takes is worth the effort! Sorry if this is hard to read. I sometimes pencil in notes describing Samuel's ability and/or cooperation during the assignment.
This is a worksheet that I made up for Samuel's science class. When there are numerous answers to be given, I usually do the writing for Samuel. Anything to get through the work for right now!
This is a worksheet I made up for Science. Handwriting isn't one of Samuel's favorite things, so I only give him small amounts to do at a time.
This is a worksheet I made up for Samuel for Social Studies. I use "Writing With Symbols." Samuel doesn't need to see a picture with each word, so it takes a little bit of work to remove/add/adjust the symbols that come up. I probably don't work with it as efficiently as it is possible to either. Anyways, the work it takes is worth the effort! Sorry if this is hard to read. I sometimes pencil in notes describing Samuel's ability and/or cooperation during the assignment.
This is a worksheet that I made up for Samuel's science class. When there are numerous answers to be given, I usually do the writing for Samuel. Anything to get through the work for right now!Spring Isn't Here Yet!
Our backyard looked like a winter wonderland yesterday afternoon! The three trees in the center of the photo are the first to bloom in the spring. These trees are probably starting to bloom where I used to live, the Tidewater area of Virginia, but we have a few weeks to wait yet.
I'll be taking Samuel in to school late this morning, and then he gets out of school early today so we'll just run errands in town after we drop him off. My oldest son has a music class after we pick up Samuel, so I'll have to figure out how to keep him happy while we wait. It shouldn't be too hard, it's only a half hour, but I will have to plan ahead!
Wednesday, March 7, 2007
Snow Day? Eventually it was!
Our weather forecast for last night called for several inches of snow. I woke up at 5:30am to find no snow. "Oh, Samuel will be so disappointed," I thought. I turned on the local news and was surprised to see surrounding counties and cities had closed their schools. Our county was not in the listing. I then tuned into The Weather Channel to see what the radar was showing, no precipitation in our area, it was all southeast or north of us. Darn, that would have been an excuse for keeping Samuel home, knowing snow was on the way. I proceeded to shuffle through making coffee, empty the dishwasher and then sat down about 15 minutes later in front of the TV again, our county's schools were now closed! Hurray, everyone can sleep in!
Samuel enjoyed staying home, as always! We read out of his textbook, did a worksheet on that, then we looked up Helen Keller on-line. We talked about her childhood. This is the second time we've talked about her and every time Samuel says, "She can't talk?" Then he wrote down her name. Later in the day we did a worksheet on contractions.
We didn't have any snow until about 1:30pm and we ended up getting about 2 inches. The snow days have added up enough for the school board to justify adding another week onto the end of the school year. This might have been a waste of a snow day, but it sure was nice to not have to leave home!
Samuel enjoyed staying home, as always! We read out of his textbook, did a worksheet on that, then we looked up Helen Keller on-line. We talked about her childhood. This is the second time we've talked about her and every time Samuel says, "She can't talk?" Then he wrote down her name. Later in the day we did a worksheet on contractions.
We didn't have any snow until about 1:30pm and we ended up getting about 2 inches. The snow days have added up enough for the school board to justify adding another week onto the end of the school year. This might have been a waste of a snow day, but it sure was nice to not have to leave home!
Successful Afternoon Out
We were back and forth from our house 3 times yesterday! I get absolutely worn out on these kinds of days; making sure I have everything I need (diapers, snacks, etc..)gathering the children up, getting them in the car, getting them out of the car and safely into wherever we are going. I have scaled back our participation in activities this winter and spring because I find just getting out to be exhausting.
Our morning consisted of getting Samuel to school and then going to our pediatrician's office (20 miles away) for the baby's 15 month check up and an ear infection follow up for my youngest son. We do have to travel a bit to get to the doctor, but it's worth it. Our pediatrician and his staff run a very efficient office and the waiting time is short. Sometimes there is almost no wait at all! This makes it very helpful for Samuel. There is no way that he could have waited as long as we used to have to at our former doctor's office. I can take Samuel to our present doctor for appointments and can take him along for other children's appointments quite easily. In the past year and a half my husband has worked close to this office as well, so sometimes he meets me there to help out.
My youngest son then had a birthday party to go to early in the afternoon. We didn't have Samuel with us when we dropped him off but I knew he would be with us when we picked him up. That can be a problem. Samuel (naturally) would want to go into the house. Once in there he would probably get into things he shouldn't and it would be very difficult to get him out. I determined ahead of time that NOONE but my youngest son would go in.
We also had about an hour to kill after we picked up Samuel from school before it was time to get his younger brother. What to do? The library was a possibility, but after all the activity I endured earlier in the day I just didn't know if I would be up for that. I decided to go to the grocery store instead. Samuel can endure short trips there because he knows that there are videos and DVDs for sale and he can look at them.
I did not have a visual schedule for our afternoon and I had not made Samuel aware earlier in the day that we wouldn't be going directly home. However, after we left the school I pulled to the side of the road and we took a few minutes to talk about what we would be doing before going home.
We got through the aisles of the grocery store without too much difficulty, except that he kept trying to "Scottish Irish Dance" (from "The Upside Down Show"). He got to look at DVDs for a few minutes and nicely accepted finishing that. Then, on the way out of the store there were 2 more unexpected DVD displays! It was quite difficult getting him to pass those by, but we were able to do so because of the promise of a trip to McDonalds for a snack. We spent the second half of our hour there. I have to admit part of the reason it was easier to get around was because my youngest son wasn't there, he can be rather ornery and feisty!
As we pulled up to the house to pick up my youngest son, Samuel really wanted to go inside, but he was able to accept "not this time." I think it helped that my oldest son voiced that to Samuel as well (impressive because my oldest son has friends at that house too and I'm sure he wanted to go in as much as Samuel did!). Even my youngest son nicely accepted that it was time to go home.
I was so happy to get home! We went through the usual evening madness of dinner and homework, and I ended up falling asleep before the boys did!
Our morning consisted of getting Samuel to school and then going to our pediatrician's office (20 miles away) for the baby's 15 month check up and an ear infection follow up for my youngest son. We do have to travel a bit to get to the doctor, but it's worth it. Our pediatrician and his staff run a very efficient office and the waiting time is short. Sometimes there is almost no wait at all! This makes it very helpful for Samuel. There is no way that he could have waited as long as we used to have to at our former doctor's office. I can take Samuel to our present doctor for appointments and can take him along for other children's appointments quite easily. In the past year and a half my husband has worked close to this office as well, so sometimes he meets me there to help out.
My youngest son then had a birthday party to go to early in the afternoon. We didn't have Samuel with us when we dropped him off but I knew he would be with us when we picked him up. That can be a problem. Samuel (naturally) would want to go into the house. Once in there he would probably get into things he shouldn't and it would be very difficult to get him out. I determined ahead of time that NOONE but my youngest son would go in.
We also had about an hour to kill after we picked up Samuel from school before it was time to get his younger brother. What to do? The library was a possibility, but after all the activity I endured earlier in the day I just didn't know if I would be up for that. I decided to go to the grocery store instead. Samuel can endure short trips there because he knows that there are videos and DVDs for sale and he can look at them.
I did not have a visual schedule for our afternoon and I had not made Samuel aware earlier in the day that we wouldn't be going directly home. However, after we left the school I pulled to the side of the road and we took a few minutes to talk about what we would be doing before going home.
We got through the aisles of the grocery store without too much difficulty, except that he kept trying to "Scottish Irish Dance" (from "The Upside Down Show"). He got to look at DVDs for a few minutes and nicely accepted finishing that. Then, on the way out of the store there were 2 more unexpected DVD displays! It was quite difficult getting him to pass those by, but we were able to do so because of the promise of a trip to McDonalds for a snack. We spent the second half of our hour there. I have to admit part of the reason it was easier to get around was because my youngest son wasn't there, he can be rather ornery and feisty!
As we pulled up to the house to pick up my youngest son, Samuel really wanted to go inside, but he was able to accept "not this time." I think it helped that my oldest son voiced that to Samuel as well (impressive because my oldest son has friends at that house too and I'm sure he wanted to go in as much as Samuel did!). Even my youngest son nicely accepted that it was time to go home.
I was so happy to get home! We went through the usual evening madness of dinner and homework, and I ended up falling asleep before the boys did!
Monday, March 5, 2007
Mentally Retarded vs. Developmentally Delayed
Last fall I took Samuel for an intake evaluation, part of the application process for what is called the "Individual and Family Medicaid Developmental Disabilities Waiver" for the State of Virginia. Once an individual is determined to be eligible for this they get put on a several year waiting list and then when services are approved the family is eligible for funding to assist with day-to-day needs. This will be very helpful to my family once the help we currently have is no longer available to us.
The intake consultant filled in some paperwork with us, completed a level of functionality assessment, and I left her with some papers from a 3-year evaluation that had been done by our school system for Samuel the previous fall (2005). I got a phone call a few weeks after that saying that Samuel was not eligible for this waiver because some test scores showed that his IQ was in the range of being considered mentally retarded. There is a separate waiver for those considered mentally retarded. I just received written notification of this last week and I have 30 days to make an appeal.
I'm not one to get all hung up on diagnoses or labels, but I do plan to appeal this decision. I want to make sure that we obtain assistance for Samuel in the correct way. I question whether the low test scores do indeed indicate mental retardation. The psychologist who tested him mentioned that she often could not understand his speech. There was also a large discrepancy between his verbal and non-verbal test scores and the psychologist stated that "results should be interpreted with caution." This seems like a very narrow circumstance to then apply a diagnosis of mental retardation. This all brings to mind what I am currently reading in Unstrange Minds: Remapping the World of Autism. In getting funded assistance for our children we are very much tied to the labels and diagnoses they are given, and these can be open to personal interpretation.
A friend of mine referred me to a consultant who coordinates state-funded assistance for her family. I explained my situation and am waiting to see what she thinks of this. I'll keep you posted as to the outcome.
The intake consultant filled in some paperwork with us, completed a level of functionality assessment, and I left her with some papers from a 3-year evaluation that had been done by our school system for Samuel the previous fall (2005). I got a phone call a few weeks after that saying that Samuel was not eligible for this waiver because some test scores showed that his IQ was in the range of being considered mentally retarded. There is a separate waiver for those considered mentally retarded. I just received written notification of this last week and I have 30 days to make an appeal.
I'm not one to get all hung up on diagnoses or labels, but I do plan to appeal this decision. I want to make sure that we obtain assistance for Samuel in the correct way. I question whether the low test scores do indeed indicate mental retardation. The psychologist who tested him mentioned that she often could not understand his speech. There was also a large discrepancy between his verbal and non-verbal test scores and the psychologist stated that "results should be interpreted with caution." This seems like a very narrow circumstance to then apply a diagnosis of mental retardation. This all brings to mind what I am currently reading in Unstrange Minds: Remapping the World of Autism. In getting funded assistance for our children we are very much tied to the labels and diagnoses they are given, and these can be open to personal interpretation.
A friend of mine referred me to a consultant who coordinates state-funded assistance for her family. I explained my situation and am waiting to see what she thinks of this. I'll keep you posted as to the outcome.
A Real Day of Rest!
For the first time in many many weeks I didn't worry about coming up with a schedule for Samuel on Sunday. My husband and oldest son were away for part of the day, so we did not go to church together in the morning like we usually do. Samuel did get a bit agitated in the morning over his videos and it took me a while to calm him down. That's not an easy thing to do when I don't have my oldest son to help out, but my youngest son was able to keep the baby company while I dealt with Samuel for 15 minutes or so. Other than that Samuel kept himself suitably entertained the rest of the day. He likes to go back and forth between playing on the computer, playing and watching Playstation, and playing with cars and trains down in the playroom.
I enjoyed not having the pressure of getting "work" together for him, which I've felt I needed to do every day for some time now!
I enjoyed not having the pressure of getting "work" together for him, which I've felt I needed to do every day for some time now!
Saturday, March 3, 2007
Welcome Break from the Afternoon Grumpies
Early yesterday afternoon a friend called me and said that a group of people was going to meet at the park. I told her that we wouldn't be going because I thought it was going to be too wet. I knew that it had gotten quite warm outside but I honestly didn't realize just how nice it really was until we left the house to get Samuel. Of course I didn't tell the other boys about the invitation that I had declined because they would have been beyond disappointed!
After we picked Samuel up and were on the way home my car just decided that it was going to steer itself over towards the park! My oldest son had his nose in a book so he didn't notice the different route we were driving, but my youngest son picked right up on it and started saying "where are we going?" "let's go to the park!" Sometimes I do drive that route so we can see how high a particular creek is running, so I'm sure the boys wondered what I was up to. At the last second I said "okay, let's see who might be at the park" and I turned in. Our friends were there and my boys were very happy to know we would be staying a while.
A group of us has gathered together, as weather has permitted, at this park for 5 1/2 years now. We call it "play group", and it has been fun to have the kids get together. This is also vital gathering time for the moms too! Our families have grown considerably over the years and the ages of the children playing are from the early teen years down to newborns. Sometimes just one or two families are there and other times there can be as many as maybe 8 - 10 or even more families (usually in the summertime when we gather more regularly).
Our ability to go to play group has been limited the past year and a half because of Samuel's uncooperativeness. He started wandering off from the field where we gather. There is a creek nearby that Samuel is attracted to and I don't like to take any chances. We did not go very much last spring between that and our baby being so young. This summer and fall we had an in-home helper on the day we go to the park so we were able to attend regularly. I took a big chance by going to the park yesterday without an in-home helper. I put my oldest son on notice that I may need his help and I spent the entire time watching Samuel like a hawk. I also told them we would only stay for 45 minutes.
It didn't even hit me until we got back home, but Samuel did better than I could have even imagined! He did walk around the edges of the play area most of the time (he told me later that he was playing "Daytona 500") but he kind of hung out for a short while with the other children who were having races. Never once did he wander from the play area and best of all he did not expect to take a walk over to another area of the park as he usually does with our helper. I took a few minutes to help Samuel jump on something in the playground area, and I was able to help my youngest son on the swing for a few minutes too. It was great to talk with my friends for a few minutes too, the bad weather has kept us from getting together as regularly as we had been last fall and early winter.
We ended up staying for an hour and a half, the boys all accepted leaving nicely (I "counted down" before time to leave), and Samuel's good mood lasted most of the evening!
A great day all around for the boys!
After we picked Samuel up and were on the way home my car just decided that it was going to steer itself over towards the park! My oldest son had his nose in a book so he didn't notice the different route we were driving, but my youngest son picked right up on it and started saying "where are we going?" "let's go to the park!" Sometimes I do drive that route so we can see how high a particular creek is running, so I'm sure the boys wondered what I was up to. At the last second I said "okay, let's see who might be at the park" and I turned in. Our friends were there and my boys were very happy to know we would be staying a while.
A group of us has gathered together, as weather has permitted, at this park for 5 1/2 years now. We call it "play group", and it has been fun to have the kids get together. This is also vital gathering time for the moms too! Our families have grown considerably over the years and the ages of the children playing are from the early teen years down to newborns. Sometimes just one or two families are there and other times there can be as many as maybe 8 - 10 or even more families (usually in the summertime when we gather more regularly).
Our ability to go to play group has been limited the past year and a half because of Samuel's uncooperativeness. He started wandering off from the field where we gather. There is a creek nearby that Samuel is attracted to and I don't like to take any chances. We did not go very much last spring between that and our baby being so young. This summer and fall we had an in-home helper on the day we go to the park so we were able to attend regularly. I took a big chance by going to the park yesterday without an in-home helper. I put my oldest son on notice that I may need his help and I spent the entire time watching Samuel like a hawk. I also told them we would only stay for 45 minutes.
It didn't even hit me until we got back home, but Samuel did better than I could have even imagined! He did walk around the edges of the play area most of the time (he told me later that he was playing "Daytona 500") but he kind of hung out for a short while with the other children who were having races. Never once did he wander from the play area and best of all he did not expect to take a walk over to another area of the park as he usually does with our helper. I took a few minutes to help Samuel jump on something in the playground area, and I was able to help my youngest son on the swing for a few minutes too. It was great to talk with my friends for a few minutes too, the bad weather has kept us from getting together as regularly as we had been last fall and early winter.
We ended up staying for an hour and a half, the boys all accepted leaving nicely (I "counted down" before time to leave), and Samuel's good mood lasted most of the evening!
A great day all around for the boys!
Dr. Seuss's Birthday Celebration at School
I received notice from Samuel's inclusion teacher earlier this past week that his class would be celebrating Dr. Seuss's birthday on Friday with a reading activity. They would be allowed to bring in a pillow, a snack, a drink, and a few books to look at. They would be taking time out from class to have some relaxed reading time. I found out the night before that they would also be reading to a kindergarten class.
As I was gathering the necessary things for Samuel to take Thursday evening I asked him a few questions about the snack he wanted to take and he joined right on in getting everything together! It was such fun seeing him interested in an upcoming event at school. When I asked him about the snack he told me he wanted peanuts and apple juice. We decided that he would take his bean bag chair and he asked to bring a blanket as well. I talked him out of bringing the comforter for his bed and he accepted taking an oversized flannel baby blanket. He also wanted to take a stuffed animal, so we found a nice squishy one. They were told to bring "a book or two," he wanted to take 5 and ended up taking six, all Dr. Seuss books! He proudly carried in his things to school yesterday morning.
We heard a "Hi Samuel!" as we were walking in. A boy walked in from the parking lot and joined us in the hallway. Samuel, with a smile on his face, said "go away". He gets excited when something unexpected like that happens, I need to review his social stories about greetings and how to respond! I finally got Samuel to return the hello and then I talked to him. He told me his name, which sounded familiar from a few school years ago. "Were you Samuel's computer buddy in kindergarten a few years ago?" He indeed was and he is in Samuel's class this year. He said that he likes to help Samuel. I thanked him for that and told him that Samuel has two brothers who help him also. He said "I know, I saw you in the grocery store last year when I was with my Mom." (Then I remembered him saying hello there also)
Samuel does seem to be pretty well-liked by his classmates. His teachers have told me that other students pitch in to help him. Samuel does not usually respond to them very much, though I think he does respond much more now than he did a few years ago. I have thought about asking the teachers what they tell the other students about Samuel and the other autistic boy in their class. One time I mentioned (in an e-mail) a book to share with the other children about an autistic classmate and the teacher never responded to being interested in it. Something I'm going to have to inquire about.
Our dialogue when I picked Samuel up yesterday afternoon was something like this:
It was great to have Samuel in a good mood after school!
As I was gathering the necessary things for Samuel to take Thursday evening I asked him a few questions about the snack he wanted to take and he joined right on in getting everything together! It was such fun seeing him interested in an upcoming event at school. When I asked him about the snack he told me he wanted peanuts and apple juice. We decided that he would take his bean bag chair and he asked to bring a blanket as well. I talked him out of bringing the comforter for his bed and he accepted taking an oversized flannel baby blanket. He also wanted to take a stuffed animal, so we found a nice squishy one. They were told to bring "a book or two," he wanted to take 5 and ended up taking six, all Dr. Seuss books! He proudly carried in his things to school yesterday morning.
We heard a "Hi Samuel!" as we were walking in. A boy walked in from the parking lot and joined us in the hallway. Samuel, with a smile on his face, said "go away". He gets excited when something unexpected like that happens, I need to review his social stories about greetings and how to respond! I finally got Samuel to return the hello and then I talked to him. He told me his name, which sounded familiar from a few school years ago. "Were you Samuel's computer buddy in kindergarten a few years ago?" He indeed was and he is in Samuel's class this year. He said that he likes to help Samuel. I thanked him for that and told him that Samuel has two brothers who help him also. He said "I know, I saw you in the grocery store last year when I was with my Mom." (Then I remembered him saying hello there also)
Samuel does seem to be pretty well-liked by his classmates. His teachers have told me that other students pitch in to help him. Samuel does not usually respond to them very much, though I think he does respond much more now than he did a few years ago. I have thought about asking the teachers what they tell the other students about Samuel and the other autistic boy in their class. One time I mentioned (in an e-mail) a book to share with the other children about an autistic classmate and the teacher never responded to being interested in it. Something I'm going to have to inquire about.
Our dialogue when I picked Samuel up yesterday afternoon was something like this:
Me- How was your reading day?
Samuel - Good. I took my socks off!
Did you have your snack?
Yes. I ate all my peanuts.
Did you read to the kindergarten class?
Yes. I read Hop on Pop and _________________.
(Can't remember the other title )
It was great to have Samuel in a good mood after school!
Friday, March 2, 2007
Afternoon Grumpies!
Our in-home services staff wasn't able to come today, her car broke down. I discovered it 15 minutes after she was due to arrive (she had left a phone message before we got home) and was in the middle of trying to keep Samuel calm. Quick change in expectations for the afternoon!
Every day when Samuel gets home he has 4 or 5 things to complete on his visual schedule, all related to putting his coat, backpack away, using the toilet, and then getting to have a snack. On days that our in-home person is here, he then has 3 more hours of activities (including a good bit of unwind time!). On days they are not here, I usually let Samuel play for about 2 hours and then I try to squeeze in a bit of homework before dinner time.
There was a time when Samuel rushed through these first few tasks, eager to get his snack. That hasn't been the case lately. He tries to hide in my husband's home office and looks at his videos. Today I had put the videos away, and he was angry that we hadn't picked up any new videos at the library (we went while he was at school). I spent the first hour we were home today helping him take several breaks. I had really hoped to clean up a bit around here, but I wanted Samuel to know that I wasn't going to put up with him being so cranky so I helped him take several breaks in a row, in which he got explanations from me about how he needed use a calm voice and have "calm hands and feet" to be able to stay downstairs. He finally settled down early in the evening.
Samuel has been asking us to repeat sentences. I used the promise of repeating a sentence as an incentive for him during his homework today! He says "Can you say 'You can't watch Cyberchase on TV because you get too upset? ' " After I do repeat him he says "I don't get too upset when I watch it on DVD"
Every day when Samuel gets home he has 4 or 5 things to complete on his visual schedule, all related to putting his coat, backpack away, using the toilet, and then getting to have a snack. On days that our in-home person is here, he then has 3 more hours of activities (including a good bit of unwind time!). On days they are not here, I usually let Samuel play for about 2 hours and then I try to squeeze in a bit of homework before dinner time.
There was a time when Samuel rushed through these first few tasks, eager to get his snack. That hasn't been the case lately. He tries to hide in my husband's home office and looks at his videos. Today I had put the videos away, and he was angry that we hadn't picked up any new videos at the library (we went while he was at school). I spent the first hour we were home today helping him take several breaks. I had really hoped to clean up a bit around here, but I wanted Samuel to know that I wasn't going to put up with him being so cranky so I helped him take several breaks in a row, in which he got explanations from me about how he needed use a calm voice and have "calm hands and feet" to be able to stay downstairs. He finally settled down early in the evening.
Samuel has been asking us to repeat sentences. I used the promise of repeating a sentence as an incentive for him during his homework today! He says "Can you say 'You can't watch Cyberchase on TV because you get too upset? ' " After I do repeat him he says "I don't get too upset when I watch it on DVD"
Thursday, March 1, 2007
Late Night Again!
The timing of dinner and getting Samuel's homework done was about the same last night as it was Tuesday night! My excuse for last night was that we had our in-home services person here until 6:30, and I didn't get a good start on making dinner (I had to finish up a math lesson with my oldest son). Good things about running late are:
- I'm able to get the baby to sleep for the night soon after dinner and then it's easier to focus on Samuel's homework. When baby is awake it's just a matter of getting either my husband or oldest son to watch her, but by that time of the evening she is usually fussy and she makes it her mission to find me, which means husband and big brother either have to chase her or confine her in the playpen!
- Samuel's internal clock just seems to run later into the evening than a neurotypical child, so a late bed-time isn't all bad for him.
Samuel has been getting quite cranky late in the afternoon. This has been happening both on days that our in-home person is here and days that she's not here. We're trying to teach Samuel to "take a break" when he has trouble controlling his temper. The challenge is that his break area is up a flight of stairs to his bedroom and he often fights getting up the stairs. We have to try to keep his pathway up there free of things that he can push down or throw and younger siblings have to steer clear as well! We have to prompt him to take the breaks right now. While he is working with the in-home services person he often asks to take a break but sometimes he has to be prompted then as well. Samuel is going to be big and tall someday so we want to teach him as many ways to regulate his temper while he is still a cute lil' youngun!
I only bothered with a 2-question worksheet about Abraham Lincoln for homework last night since it was so late and Samuel complied very quickly!
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