Sunday, July 4, 2010

Walmart and Life Skills/Social Skills Training

My husband and I are doing our best to continue taking Samuel out in public in spite of the chance that he may "melt down". When I take Samuel out I bring along some kind of visual schedule for him to follow. These visual schedules have had various forms over the years. The current one I like to use is a checklist of the broad activities we plan to undertake at our destination. I can just write it out on paper and carry it on a clipboard with a pen.

These days, Walmart is proving to be a great place to take Samuel. I am able to take him there about once a week. Our first trips there had to be very short on getting "my things" done, followed by an opportunity for Samuel to do his favorite thing.. look at the DVDs. (It took him a while to understand and accept that Walmart no longer carries VHS tapes!)

Yesterday morning I had planned to go to Walmart early in the morning. I had a relatively short list of things to pick up, but it was a longer list than I usually have when I take Samuel. However, it had been a while since I had taken him and I knew that taking him would be a real treat for him, so I woke him up and gave him the good news. Talk about a good motivator to dress himself!

Here was the checklist he had:

-Shopping

-Look at Electronics (just looking at DVDs isn't enough anymore, he has broadened his tour to laptops, Blue Ray players, and cameras)

-Pay (stay with Mom, no running around!)

-Look at the Red Box DVD machine on our way out the store (by that time I'm usually more than ready to leave, but giving him a chance to look at it at the end saves me from getting stuck at it when we walk in)

While we are there he gets to work on his social skills (it's okay to say hi to others, but don't ask them what year they were born or what their phone number is, walking down the aisles instead of skipping and running!), life skills (finding groceries, properly placing them in the basket, being patient while Mom has to look for boring things like canned vegetables and toilet paper, one of these days we'll get to paying...), and some OT-related things (pushing the cart, looking where you are going while pushing the cart, not crashing into other people while pushing the cart, not crashing into the shelves and displays while pushing the cart).

Other challenges we face right now when taking him out, besides the ones I just mentioned, are to keep him from manipulating us into getting him all kinds of snacks and sodas. The soda one is particularly difficult. He goes straight for the little coolers right by the cash registers when it is time to pay and gets very close to melting down when I tell him no. Soda is something I try to save an incentive for doing well at his OT sessions, and we allow all the kids to have it with dinner on Sunday.

Tell me about your experiences taking your child "on the spectrum" out in public and how you are teaching him or her!

Monday, May 24, 2010

The end of this past January marked three years since I started this blog. It's hard to remember now, but I started it due to my frustration with the whole "defeat autism" attitude that I seemed to be encountering everywhere. It was very refreshing to come across people on the internet who were more accepting of autism, though who still faced incredible challenges in raising their children "on the spectrum". I also found it very therapeutic to share what I was going through at the time with my son.

I don't post on here so much anymore. It's not that I don't want to. I DO, but spare time is very rare for me these days. I'm not going to complain and lament too much, this is just where I am at right now thanks to what is going on in my family.

Samuel is growing up. It hasn't been easy and I think our "fun" is just beginning! Life for him has changed quite a bit since this past winter. He turned 11 just after the new year. He is almost as tall as I am now and has surpassed even his older brother in weight. He can be quite a force to contend with! He is now taking Risperdal to help moderate his temper. That's not by any means where it is ending, that is just the beginning of what has become a new road for us to journey on in helping Samuel to grow and develop. Amazingly, a new social group formed in our area and Samuel was able to attend that for thirteen weeks this past winter and spring, along with 3 other children close to his age. How terrific that something like this came along to help him recognize and learn how to deal with social situations. There are times he is quite vocal about his feelings ("Mommy, I'm so sad!" or "Mommy, I'm very very angry!"). I am so happy that he is able to verbalize these things and I am trying to figure out how to take him to the next step.. getting past those sad and angry feelings. In the coming weeks we will be starting new in-home behavior treatment services for him. I still use his visual schedule but we are definitely at a point where we need some fresh ideas and strategies to teach him how to get through his day with appropriate behaviors.

Well, the "free" time I had to work on this post is about over. Samuel is behind me telling me (thankfully, with a smile on his face) how "angry" he is with me! I promised him a snack a while ago and I suppose I should go make good on it!

Sunday, March 28, 2010

Examiner.com: Autism: 8 rules for the road for parents of newly diagnosed children



Much of this list seems like common sense to me now, but it sure would have been nice to have something this concise to refer to 7 1/2 years ago when Samuel was diagnosed.

Autism: 8 rules for the road for parents of newly diagnosed children

Print this out and post it on your refrigerator! 1) GET HELP. Contact your local regional center and make use of their EXTENSIVE resources that include assessment, diagnosis, referrals and counseling, just to name a few. The...

To read the rest of this article, please click on the link below:

http://www.examiner.com/x-26516-SF-Autism--Parenting-Examiner~y2010m3d28-Autism-8-rules-for-the-road-for-parents-of-newly-diagnosed-children?cid=email-this-article

I would like to elaborate a little on #8 in the list:

Besides Facebook, find other ways to network with other parents whose children have also been diagnosed with autism. Networking can be in your local area, in your region, or through something on-line like Facebook or blogging. Other parents going through circumstances like yours can be a great source of practical information and support.


Sunday, January 17, 2010

Worth Celebrating!

Due to my oldest son's racing activities, every now and then I find myself without my husband around Sunday mornings when it is time to go to church. I am happy to say that this morning Samuel, his sister, and I all successfully made it through mass, on our first attempt! I made sure to give Samuel advance notice about how things would happen. I usually have to sit with him separately from the rest of the family; he gets distracted and agitated with his siblings around. The only other time I tried this was when I had one of his brothers with us, Samuel did not care for it. We had some close calls this morning: he loves to tease his sister and one time he started getting agitated when I asked him to change the position he was sitting in. I tackled these challenges by giving Samuel some words of encouragement and a few hugs and thankfully it helped.

To celebrate our success we went out for breakfast, with more good results! That was no small feat either, with a very tempting gift shop to maneuver through as we entered and exited! (Can you guess what restaurant I might be talking about!?)

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Happy "Remake of 2009"!

Where on earth did Christmas and New Year's Day go!? They went by in such a flash and I feel like I barely got to savor any of it! In spite of the rushed feeling, however, we had a great time. The kids and I took a much-needed two week break from school work. It has been a few years since I have "officially" done this. Having time to devote to baking, cookie decorating, and even some ornament making was so much nicer than trying to cram it in between lessons.

Samuel, in his "life is all about DVDs and VHS tapes" style, is refusing to acknowledge the new year as 2010, but instead is calling it "The Remake of 2009." As he looked at his calendar last week he said things like, "The original 2009 is ending. January 1st is the start of the Remake of 2009!"

One of a few nice surprises that have come up with Samuel recently are that we have been able to take him to different masses at church with mostly nice results. For a while I only felt comfortable taking him to one particular mass that did not have music. In the past month he has been able to endure not only music, but also the priest who he had been quite afraid of. I still have to take him out for a "break" during the homily so it is hard for me to ever get to hear it. It seems that he can take the noise in the church when it is in the form of prayers and readings he is familiar with, but when a priest gets up and talks more freely during the homily (sometimes with very heartfelt emotion), it is more than he can handle. He is even more sensitive in the vestibule area, where the speaker volume is often very high, so we usually have to retreat to the stairwell of the church building. It's all a part of the long road we're travelling on to teach Samuel the importance of God and of his faith in his life. Samuel will be making his First Penance and First Communion this year, and I am so grateful that for going on three years now I have been able to take him into the church and sit with him for a good portion of mass each week.

An even more recent surprise with Samuel is that he has become much more accepting of eating the foods I prepare for the entire family at dinner time. For years I had to have a back-up dinner for Samuel, and often for his younger siblings as well. This past year I tried to have the kids eat what I prepared instead of having to make another meal, it just got to be too much to have to make 2 and sometimes 3 entrees. The rest of the kids went along quite well, but it was always tough with Samuel. In the last few weeks however there were some days I just didn't feel like going through the trouble of preparing anything else and I just put a plate in front of Samuel. Much to my surprise he actually ate what I served! I have found that casserole-type entrees go over the best for him. He does not seem to like eating meat. He is tolerating pasta much better now as well.

Best wishes for a terrific 2010!

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Happy Thanksgiving!

I would like to wish everyone a wonderful Thanksgiving! It will be a quiet one for us this year. For the first time that I can recall, it will be just our immediate family. We are usually treated to the culinary talents of a good friend, but he was not able to join us this year. My husband does not particularly care for turkey, so I will instead roast a chicken and serve it with a few of the typical side dishes: mashed potatoes, stuffing, sweet potatoes..

I have not posted in a while, but we are all doing well. We went on a two week vacation in October and I am still "catching up" from that. So, I am very thankful today for the quiet time that we are able to spend together.



Samuel continues to make leaps in his school work with reading and spelling. His handwriting seems to have made some improvements lately too. I continue to place dots on the paper where he should start his letters ( something that is done in Handwriting Without Tears) and he is doing better at properly placing them within the lines. At the same time, we are challenged by him being "in his own world" with his VHS tapes. He constantly talks about them, doing "reviews" like he watches on You Tube videos. He continues to be motivated to do his school work by checklists that reward him with a purchase of a VHS tape.



I wish everyone the best with the upcoming Holiday Season, especially those whose children with autism may have a difficult time. The Autism Society and other organizations are good about giving tips for how to deal with the holidays, so be sure to check those out when you have a moment!



I'm going to be traveling with my two youngest children for a quick visit to my parents this weekend. I'm trying to prepare Samuel for our separation, the first since I went into the hospital to have my youngest child four years ago. Later in December I plan to visit my parents again with all four children. Both of these occasions will require some planning ahead. I'll let you know how it goes!

The photo: This mountainous stack of videos is one of the many ways Samuel goes about organizing them as he "reviews" them. Another variation is for him to stack them according to who produced them, for example.. Nickelodeon, Universal Studios, etc..

Friday, September 25, 2009

Rethinking Autism: Autistics Speak

This is great to see.. an organization/website that wants the attitude about autism that is presented in the media to show more respect and dignity towards those individuals who have autism.

It was 2 1/2 years ago that I wrote a post expressing my dissatisfaction about how autism was being portrayed in the media.