"Can I Help?"

My husband and the boys worked on putting up our tree a few nights ago. Samuel usually gets quite excited when we pull out all the Christmas decorations, but he tends to stay on the periphery of activity. I was cleaning up in the kitchen when I heard Samuel ask my husband, "Can I help?" I was so happy to hear this! He helped for a short while and then was off and running again.

Tonight we put ornaments on the tree. He hung around the living room while the other children and I did the work. As each ornament was pulled out we had some commentary to go along with it; who had made it or who gave it to us, when we got it, etc.. I had shown Samuel an ornament he had made at school and was just about to hang it up when he said, "Wait, let me hang it!"

Samuel has his own way of participating in our family's Christmas activities, but he definitely participates! He seems to tolerate differences in our yearly activities as well. Last year we hardly decorated the house at all since we went up to Maine for Christmas. This year we waited a long time to get the decorations out. No complaints so far!

Thanks for the comments and good wishes everyone! The fun here is continuing so I just have to give an update! This morning (Christmas Eve morning) I had to call Santa on emergency speed dial from my cell phone. This was for the benefit of my youngest son. Samuel was horrified, "Oh no, Santa! We're doomed!" was his comment. On our way up to Occupational Therapy in the car he gleefully told me, "Hey Mommy, this is Christmas Eve; Santa comes tonight!" Samuel has never expressed so much interest in Santa verbally so this is great fun!

Refrigerator Mothers

Julee posted this video at her blog "Discovering Nathan" back in November.

This is an amazing video about what mothers of children with autism had to endure just a few short decades ago. Parts of it are heartbreaking and parts are downright chilling, especially Bruno Bettelheim's interview on the Dick Cavett Show.

Things aren't perfect now, but I am so glad that I don't have to endure the popular theory that I caused my son's autism!

This video is long, almost an hour, so please be sure you have a good bit of time before you try to watch it; I don't want you to neglect your kids or dinner or holiday preparations!

Navigating the Maze

Well, our Special Education Advisory Committee Meeting has come and gone. I had a few minutes at the end of the meeting to introduce our yahoo group, which is called "Navigating the Maze." This is a private group, so it's not accessible when you do a search for groups on Yahoo.

A good portion of the people at the meeting signed up for it and hopefully they will share it with others and the word will spread and it will get used. I think it will be a good thing for parents to be able to connect with each other, and for an on-line forum to exist in which those in education and other professions that help those with special needs can be in touch with us also. I have encouraged the Director of Special Education to share this group with teachers so that they can pass it on to the parents of their students.

Here is what the home page of the group says:

The families and caregivers of children with special needs face an often
overwhelming journey as they search for assistance, support, and services. Many
of us who have been on this journey for a while wish to share information and
experiences. This is a group consisting of families, professionals, and other
interested community members in XXXXXX County, Virginia, and the surrounding
area. It is our hope that the information, discussion, and ideas presented on
this group will assist members as they complete their own journey of finding
appropriate supports and services for the individuals with special needs that
they serve or care for.

As of late yesterday afternoon, our region of Virginia no longer has Early Intervention Services being provided to children from birth up to age 3. I think this is unfortunate, but I am not surprised. I have a hunch that due to tough economic times lack of funding is going to grow into a much bigger problem for services than it is already.

I think it is more important than ever for parents to know that government services are not the only means of helping their children. Don't get me wrong here, I WANT children to get the help that they need. When the help isn't there though in avenues that it has been available in the past, parents need to make some decisions about where they are going to put their energy. Will it be into fighting bureaucracies to get them to pay for services or will they work directly towards getting the help for their children?

There isn't a lot out there right now in the form of private help for our children. When there is private help it's expensive, and the question often seems to get asked of us, "why aren't you using your county's services?" It gets frustrating.

What do you think? Is anyone else seeing any problems because of the lack of money in their children's schools or programs? Do you think it will get better any time soon? Will your insurance cover services that your local or state government cannot or will not pay for anymore? Will your insurance pay for services you obtain privately when you choose not to use the services that your county currently provides?

Starting a New Yahoo Group

Tonight I'm speaking at our Special Education Advisory Committee meeting. I will be introducing a yahoo group that will hopefully serve individuals, professionals, and educators in our local area. We especially hope that it will be helpful to parents of newly diagnosed children with special needs who are finding the search for services and supports to be overwhelming. I remember in the early days after Samuel was diagnosed the information I obtained from other parents was like gold! Anyways, wish me luck!

I'd love to hear how any of you reading this use yahoo groups. I'm currently a member on 20 groups! I only receive messages on about 4 or 5 of them, however. Some are about autism, some are about homeschooling, some are local information, and a few pertain to hobbies I have. I think they are a great way to connect with others who have the same interests!

"Come on, let's play!"

I'm hearing Samuel say this frequently these days and it's kind of nice! When it is time for him to go to the playroom in our basement he will summon any or all of his siblings to join him, depending on who is around. I'm not quite sure if he is actually playing WITH them. It could be that he is only trying to avoid being alone downstairs. His siblings will be able to fill me in. In the meantime, I'm liking the direction he is going with this!